This is the Jocko underground podcast number 139 sitting here with Michael Charles, getting into some
Q&A proceed sir. All right off. Yeah, advice for the people.
Yeah, that's what we're calling it. It's, it's also a reflection or an analysis of what's happening in life. Other people are going through, we can kind of apply. I'm one of those are world. You and me both let's go let's go.
All right first
Subject of inquiry will say, I Jocko. I'm on the path to becoming a Navy. SEAL Jiu-Jitsu weight, lifting running and swimming are all part of my routine. I just turned 18 and talk to a recruiter on my birthday. However though I have strong discipline in these areas, I don't know how to stop caring about what other people think about me. I hope people's opinion too high sometimes understand that it's important to be humble and accept, correction, and wisdom for my good for my good.
But what about people who want to take you down a notch? What about people? Who insult you with insults that aren't even true. I want to stop fearing other people and to become a courageous, man. How did you do it Jocko PS, lovely podcast so much and I quote, Charles are awesome.
So not not to be kind of harsh on this, just out of the gate, but he's gotta get over that stuff. Like you got to get over it, you will get annihilated
annihilated in
training even in boot camp. If you take things personally,
In boot camp, they'll attack you go. Watch any, you know, Full Metal Jacket Officer and a Gentleman, anything where they portray, any boot camp scenario, it's just personal attacks. That's what's happening, that's what we're going through. So, if your let the stuff bother you, you're going to fail, you're gonna freak out. So just you got it. You got to just move on. You got to get over this kind of thing and maybe you have some weird insecurities in your mind that you don't think you're good enough for.
Something like that. And what can you do to overcome? Those things is just keep working out. Keep training, keep getting stronger and faster and study. And so you become smarter and keep training Jiu-Jitsu so you know how to fight.
And then you should become secure enough in yourself because this is, this is a real sign of insecurity. Am I wrong? I think. Yeah. It's a real sign of insecurity where someone is so focused. On what other people think that inside their own mind? They think that same thing and they get mad. Even when things that aren't true, like, it's just just not good. So how did so, how are you going to deal with these things from actual methodologies? Will number one is ignore them.
But ignoring can kind of backfired because if I'm if I tease you, I know you like the word tease. If I teased you about something and you like, ignore it, kind of to the extreme, I know it got to, you know, what to do with more, right? You can kind of change the subject, which it might be a little bit less obvious than extrait ignore. You know? If I say Echo you're bald and ugly and you go a and then you say hey hit record on that thing over there. You know it's kind of like it didn't really impact. You wasn't that big of a deal.
If I say Echo, you're bald and ugly and you're like oh 100% can you hit record? You see what I'm saying? So you can also kind of acknowledge it and sort of be unfazed by it.
I agree with it, but I think that's kind of the mat the most magic one is when someone says, hey, you're bald and ugly and Echo. Charles says, honestly, that's a good assessment. I agree with you. Like these are, that's it. That's a really good one. You use that on line one time. Sure. Someone laid into you seen real scathing kind of way to it. You're not funny in and out in a not I'm having fun. Kind of way again, really try to get. You sure they said something, you know, why is this guy even on the podcast?
Cast. He brings nothing and nothing. He says matters, something's a waste of air time, something like that and you replied honestly, that's a fair assessment. Took the wind out of his sails kind of and in its own right. Kind of let us know why you're here in the first place. You do to beat it was a double edged. It was a double attack, I like it. So agree, you know, nod smile, like yeah, I am ugly and bald. And then finally, you know, laughing laugh it off in the way of the warrior kid.
Nathan. James is calling Mark plate face. He's got a round face plate faceplate face and it's not until Marcos. That's pretty funny. My face is gone around and then he realizes that those words don't have as much power Z. Nathan James realizes that the war doesn't have as much power as he'd hoped
And so also just kind of recognize that you're not perfect, right? You're not even though you're doing Jiu-Jitsu. And even though you're disciplined in all these things, you're still just a dude. You know, we talked about this on the Last underground podcast. The fact that being Eagle Scout can be really good, it can also be really bad. So if you are disciplined weight, lifting running doing Jiu-Jitsu and swimming and you want to
be a Navy SEAL
and you think that makes you better than everyone else. It's a problem. Let's make you better. Do anybody else?
Just make means that you're doing certain things.
Also this is kind of weird. Don't do you not have friends like that? Also make fun of that the other guys and make fun of you and everyone kind of tease each other and and that's what's happening. Like it's weird to me a little bit that there's no you know they make fun of my friends and me or my friends. Sometimes make fun of me or my friends. Make fun. It's just this guy by himself. So
I'm just saying you know hang out with some other people that you can kind of have some banter with and it's fun. By the way I was talking about SEAL training in a seal platoon do. It's it's on like Donkey Kong. I mean it's 24/7. We're going anything that any mistake that you make or don't make any imperfection that you have or perceived imperfection that you have will be addressed.
Aggressively regularly.
You know, another thing to think about is people that are like coming at you, they have their own little issues. Here's like the full psychological thing is, you know, if Echo is making fun of me for being whatever, if you make fun of me for not having money, because actually, you don't really have that much money, you make fun of me for being bald. Well, it's actually because your body's him saying is that whole thing or even? It's not even, it's not even that you're bald. But you're bald and you see that, I'm not so you make fun of, you know my car you find a way because
You're insecure. So there's that to you could look at other people. Well, that's kind of what I think if someone's in someone's legitimately coming after me, it's like what you that guy's got problems. You know, that guy that person's got problems. So
Just remember that the other people that are common at you. They're making fun of you. They're just trying to cover up for something themselves, trying to make themselves feel better. So don't worry about it. Another thing you could do is do an analysis of what they're saying, like, it sounds to me like this guy in many respects is pretty squared away. He does Jiu-Jitsu, he lifts weights, he runs, he swims. That means he's probably in pretty good physical shape, right? It sounds like he's got discipline, so he's not like a slob, right?
So he's probably looking pretty squared away.
So what are they making fun of, you know, I mean like, what are they picking on and then well if they're picking on you because you don't have any friends but you're sitting at the lunch table alone. I'll go say hi to some folks. If they're making fun of you because you're awkward when you talk, couldnt go get better at speaking to people. You see what I'm saying? Like they could be right about some stuff? No, I've had people criticize me, you know, it's a pretty good point.
Point. That's a pretty good point. You know, when, when my friend Grizz died and my friend, Chris came to me and said, you know, he didn't just die for you. Meaning I was like acting like the it was, you know, my eye was the most important friend that he had. It was totally wrong. He said that smells like oh dang, you're right. Totally, I realized 100%. Yeah. And so sometimes you got to listen to what people are saying. Oh, oh.
This is accurate. Hmm, this is an accurate statement. So
That's kind of where I'm at. What can you do to take some of that statements that are being made towards you if they're true? Analyze them, make some adjustments and then also you just gotta accept that this bantering and tearing down of people and of things is 100% a part of life. In fact, I'll go further than that.
Tearing things down, is easier than building things up. So that's the kind of, that's the default human thing. The default human thing is to tear down rather than to build. So expect that what people are going to do is tear you down. Okay. Arrogant.
There is an easy way to get arrogant to like, oh, they're just, they're just jealous of any right. Don't do that. Just accept that people are going to come at you. They're gonna come at you. They're going to try and tear you down. It's part of life. It's easier to tear down than build up, and they're going to try and tear you down. That's what people are going to do in life people at work. People at school people in your seal platoon everywhere. So just be ready for that and then just rise above and carry on. That's what you got to do.
I got
ya rise above and carry on. I feel like that's like a good good. General approach. Oh, it's a real good General approach of the I think that there's like a couple of things though, only. Because I to say, on be honest, I kind of understand what this guy's saying when they care too much. Yeah, yeah. Okay. Like, you know, if someone's like because I mean they kind of play off each other when it's like I hold people's opinions too.
Too high sometimes, right? Like almost, like almost like it. Really bothers you. If someone doesn't like you only be in not necessarily because you got to be liked by everyone. But just because
And I'm only speaking from experience, I don't, I can't read this guy's mind, you know, I'm not a mind-reader, you know that about me. But if there's any overlap here, it's more because I think I've gone around thinking, like, hey, I don't have bad intentions towards people. Like why would they have it bad intentions towards me and it didn't like compute, you know, and I bothered me maybe I did something and I didn't know, you know, and they'd always come down to more. One of the things they would always come down to is like that. Maybe I don't take certain things as seriously as I should, you know.
You know, you can get mad at someone if you're like in a serious spot meant to leave. Something serious is going on, then, someone's joking around like that can really like be bad. So I'd always be like, shit was I like joking around too much? I don't know. Did I do something unlike that? I didn't realize I did in this person's. Just like, doesn't like me now. And for whatever reason, I always felt like I was overly sensitive to that. Like, oh shit, this person's mad at me. Did I do something wrong? Like, that kind of thing. And I, but it was like, it didn't feel like
I felt like I was too sensitive. I didn't feel like it was appropriate.
So did you did you mature out of this or like what are you still there.
Put it this way. I'm still living with it. Give me my but um, put it this way. I think. When you kind of self-reflect. Yeah, I think and accept certain things like yeah, people are like you can't read anyone's mind. You don't know what's going on with people. So it's like you can't you can't just take it like that there's a lot more going on. And from there I just figure man, I'm just going to do.
My best, you know, and there
is clearly there's a spectrum because you know, when you hear someone say don't care about what don't worry about, what anyone else thinks. Yeah, well then you can be crazy you can't do stuff that's unacceptable right? And yet if you're just too afraid to do anything because you're too scared because of what people think and now you don't make any moves, you don't want to stand out, you don't want to State your own mind and you're just kind of being a rope. So that is a little excerpt of what we are doing on the jock.
Underground podcast, so if you want to continue to listen.
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